BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Look at these dumb people! They were over the salary cap and couldn't finish in the top three of the division. They couldn't beat the Kings. Drew Doughty and Anze Kopitar have bald tires and make sparks on the ice. They were not close to the Kings. The Knights are miles behind the Eskimos, who have been the biggest jokes in hockey for five years.
We have heard all about it, Knights. The injuries. The horror. If the Knights had a policy of credit fraud, the injuries wouldn't have mattered. You have nothing in your hand but your own dick, because all the depth is somewhere else. You tried to trade Dadonov at the trade deadline, but he couldn't read because you couldn't. How American.
Knights fans, what team could overcome an injury to their goalie? You are the first team in history to find out that trusting Robin Lehner is not a good idea. Who told you? That's right, everyone! Imagine him blowing out his shoulder while trying to play goalie with a megaphone in his hand and telling you what he thinks about everything. You should prepare for the tell-all interview this summer. You know it's coming. Which will be made even more delicious, because you already signed a contract to be the nice guy in hockey, and you didn't keep your promise. You said the ends justified the means and you had to be ruthless to win a Cup. Sentiment was not allowed. Maybe you do, maybe there isn't, but you won't find out.
The organization became the most up-its-own-ass in the NHL thanks to catching lightning in a bottle. The chase of big-ticket items became confused with progressive thinking. This is the same team that lost to the Habs last year. The team is the worst in hockey.
Don't worry, Knights, it will get easier next season or the one after that when you have less and less room for support pieces. All of your season-ticket bases are somewhere else. When Max Pacioretty and Mark Stone get hurt trying to park in the players' lot and their cars just pass within three feet of each other, everyone will move on to something else. As cool as your ceremonies are, they will have less effect in front of the fans. The lack of support will be complained about by Lehner.
Your gold helmets look like Notre Dame, which is fine, as that outfit hasn't won anything and won't win jackshit. Your owner refers to the army as well. Alex Pietrangelo is getting slower. The Knights will be declared the winners by Jonathan Marchessault. You should keep waiting for William to shoot 25 percent again. It will work out eventually.
You will be okay though. Hockey writers are upset that they can't drink for free in Vegas in the coming playoffs, so there will be lots of sympathy pieces over the next few weeks. They will get even more angry when the Flames or Avs win the first round and deprive hockey writers of their other favorite destinations to attend.
Jack Eichel is a loser. Thanks for your time.
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