By design, Elaine Welteroth's social media accounts are goals.
A quick scroll shows the author, Project Runway judge, and former Teen Vogue editor in chief living an aspirational life: colorful outfits, flawless makeup, a beautiful home, vacations with her husband, red-carpet appearances, and, on occasion, cuddles with a niece or nephew.
AuntieE is available for babysitting duties. The caption of one reel shows Welteroth smiling ear-to- ear in a bright blue jumpsuit, holding the hands of a baby and dancing to Eve's "Who's That Girl?"
A post shared by Elaine Welteroth (@elainewelteroth)
This is the life of AuntieE, a woman who is stylish, well-traveled, career-oriented, and has money to spend on children who aren't her own.
The life that more young women are aspiring to in today's economy is the cool aunt.
I will probably never be a mom. The text in the video reads "You know what I will be", and "The cool, single, rich aunt who doesn't look a day over 20 and has a second house in Italy."
When everyone asks if you're having kids, but you're the cool aunt,kelseywilliams60 posted a video of herself holding a baby as text scrawls across the screen.
ThePANK life is stronger than ever. The term "professional aunt, no kids" was first used by Melanie Notkin in 2008. The aunt persona is an increasingly popular identity for women in their 20s and 30s, as the stigma of a childless life has turned into a popular movement to be child-free.
Many women are choosing a child-free life because of economics, which include: Some want to build wealth first; some think they will never be able to afford kids; and others are seizing opportunities that didn't exist for women 50 years ago. The climate crisis has devastating effects to worry about. Many women would rather shower their nieces and nephews with love and attention than give them back to their parents at the end of the day.
In Black and Indian communities, the term Auntie is often used to refer to a woman older than the speaker. Some people think it is a term of respect or endearment, others think it is ageist and sexist. Unless it is coming from an actual niece or nephew, Winfrey, King, and DuVernay have all rejected the term.
The term has been appropriated by women of all races. They are using social media to claim a child-free identity, and are calling themselvesauntie. The videos tagged #auntielife have more than one billion views on TikTok. Most of the women who aspire to a clean home, disposable income, ample travel, and a carefree status in the lives of their nieces and nephews could go by simply andaunt.
It has not always been so nice. In her book Where the Aunts Are: Family, Feminism, and Kinship in Popular Culture, a professor at Michigan Tech explores aunt life as an alternate path of womanhood.
The appeal ofaunting has become even stronger as more women delay having children or decide not to have them at all.
The role of aunting has become more popular as it has become more appealing. The depiction of the affluent, cool aunt as someone who can shower their nieces and nephews in gifts, with aunt-labeled merchandise, such as tote bags or Cool Aunt sweatshirts, popping up to accommodate, explains the growing depiction.
It is a business move because of a demographic shift. The birth rate in the US has been falling since 2008 as women delay having kids until later in life, in line with worldwide trends. The US birth rate fell by 4% in the year, the lowest rate in nearly 50 years, and the lowest number of births since 1979.
While many of the 18.4 million PANKs in the 20 to 50 age range in the US want to be mothers but can't have children or haven't found themselves in the right situation, other child-free women have taken steps to stay that way. The average cost of child care is $10,000 a year, the Pandemic continues to persist, and women of childbearing age still struggle to gain a financial footing.
There are also people who are not interested in having children regardless of economic circumstances. More than half of respondents in a recent survey said it was not likely that they would have children.
Being an aunt gives those who can't afford kids a sense of kinship, and those who aren't interested in raising kids the best of both worlds: independence and family.
Kids are expensive and sticky, and I would rather be the fun aunt that does crafts with them, and has a beautiful home that doesn't have to be childproofed.
Being an auntie has all the benefits of being a mom, according to a video posted by TikTok userwreckitwren98.
Sotirin said that part of the appeal of aunthood is the chance to be creative with your identity.
She said that the aunt becomes who she is when she develops herself as who she is.
Haylie Swenson is fond of the fluid connection between aunt and child.
She told Insider that she doesn't just mean the freedom to sleep as long as she wants. I do not have to teach them how to be people in a constantly changing world. I get to love them, be myself, and let them be themselves.
Being an aunt is not defined by blood. There are a lot of "chosen families" these days, a concept made popular by queer people who may have rocky relationships with their biological families. Children can see other life opportunities when they see examples of this.
It could be the cool aunt who takes you out for dinner and talks to you like an adult. There are a lot of ways that aunts can give us other possibilities about what women can do and who women can be.
She said that aunts can be both role models and resources for the family.
That is how Lake views her aunt role. She told Insider that being child-free by choice gives her and her husband more time to spend with her niece.
She said she hopes to be an added support system that steps in to help, run chores, babysit, and just show up for family and friends.