If we all talked about suicide, wouldn’t that be better for everyone? | Xavier Mulenga

Not many people are able to talk about suicide with their friends or family, even though it is a topic that gets a lot of media airtime.

This is not surprising, considering the nature of the topic and the stigma that many people experience when talking about suicide. Almost everyone has been affected by a suicide or suicide attempt at some point in my career as a psychiatrist.

You have to ask.

About 700,000 people die from suicide each year, according to the World Health Organization. In Australia, around nine deaths a day are associated with suicide attempts.

We ask our patients if they are feeling suicidal or if they have made plans to end their lives.

In the earlier years of my training, I was surprised when people said that they had never been asked this before.

I was working an evening shift when I received a call from the doctors in the emergency department to review Anna, a 19-year-old girl who had overdosed on pills.

She told me that she had been bullied in high school and that she had contemplated suicide. At that time, she was at her lowest point and thought about ending her life a lot. People may be surprised by how long someone can think about ending their life.

Anna gave her parents a contact number and they came to the hospital. Anna was given the go-ahead to go home with her parents after she was referred to the community mental health team.

Patrick came to me with a question, "How can I stop this from happening again?" I knew what he wanted to hear, but I couldn't give 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299 888-353-1299

He had been aware that Anna was struggling but had never thought she would end her life. Paper provides little solace to worried parents, but I gave Patrick some information sheets and emergency numbers.

There are few harrowing scenes that compare to parents leaving the hospital with a child who has had their first suicide attempt.

Over the years, suicide awareness has increased in our pop culture and social media. People are more comfortable with the idea that suicide is a major health concern. This doesn't mean that people are more comfortable talking about suicide with a distressed person.

If you have had a sibling, parent, or partner attempt to end their life, you might be able to bring it up, but we need more people to ask people who are struggling.

People who are left behind are the most hurt by suicide.

If you are a psychiatrist long enough you will have your fair share of patients take their lives and there is nothing you can do to change that.

If we reach a point where people can make mainstream jokes about suicide, then we would be close to the mark

Many doctors feel helpless when they can't help their patients or lose a life in their care. Mental health services have continued to provide education and support for people with mental health issues. Mental health services use knowledge, destigmatisation and empowerment to engage the public.

Two years after the suicide of his only son, Mr. Ansari presented to the community mental health service with significant depression.

He took his life at the age of 30. Mr Ansari and his wife divorced due to his depression and parental grief. The death of a child can affect relationships. There is no easy way to accept rending your child.

Mr Ansari was admitted to a mental health ward because of his suicidal thoughts. He was referred to see a psychologist after starting on antidepressants. I couldn't help but think of him as a lonely sad man because the medications and therapy were effective.

He brought up his son and we talked about the last weeks of his life. Mr Ansari knew that his son had a previous overdose in his early twenties. I asked if he had spoken to his son about suicide.

He became angry and asked, "Aren't that your job?" A valid question and often asked by fathers, is "How is a parent meant to ask their child if they want to kill themselves?"

I let him vent his frustration at the mental health services. He was followed up by his doctor and psychologist. I like to think we ended on a good note, but I have never been able to ask him about that. I asked a colleague what had happened to him and was told he had returned to Pakistan to be with his siblings as there was little left for him in Australia.

The question of who is the most qualified to ask questions about suicide is often raised by the public. We are more than happy to hear that many people would prefer if professionals did this.

If we all asked about suicide, wouldn't that be better for everyone?

I believe that more campaigns should focus on the destigmatisation of suicide and self-injury. The average person would be able to discuss suicide or self- harm in a non-judgmental way. The goal is for suicide to be talked about in the same way that people talk about diabetes, heart attacks or strokes.

If we reach a point where people can make jokes about suicide, then we would be close to mark. We make jokes about medical conditions that kill people, but we don't want to make jokes about suicide.

My point is not to be disrespectful, but the less taboo discussions around suicide are likely to make people feel comfortable talking about it. This might lead to earlier detection of mental distress or illness which could be a deciding factor in getting people into treatment earlier, with the idea of potentially reducing the chance of people ending their lives.

You will often see a story of a person who has ended their life when you open your browser or TV screen. We feel helpless and empathise, but then we move on. Suppression is a way to cope. I want you to be able to ask the difficult questions and share your own experiences so that you can feel more confident.

We need to talk about suicide.