The dead of all ages, shapes and sizes have been the focus of my career as a forensic pathologist. For the past 40 years, I have looked closely at death, knowing that for most of the people I examine, the start of their final day had been normal. Death had come quickly and unexpectedly. I wonder where I will be at the end of the day as I dress. At home? Are you talking about being slid into a fridge in a mortuary?
We had been expecting a global epidemic for a long time. The HIV/Aids epidemic of the 80s resulted in about 36 million deaths worldwide, but I never anticipated that the first outbreak of the 21st century would be in China. When the flu killed 50 million people worldwide in 1918, I had expected it to come from a reorganisation of the virus's genes. In 2009, swine flu caused about 500,000 deaths. 50 years is a long time to wait for a serious flu epidemic.
Death had become a subject to be avoided or glossed over. Our lack of experience often meant it felt overwhelming
I am unusual in that I have had a longstanding personal insight into death and the precarious nature of our lives. Many of us have never seen a dead person. The tradition of paying your respects to the body in an open coffin in the parlour is not as common as it used to be. The chance to remember your own impermanence was offered by this.
By the start of this century, it seemed to me that death had become a subject that was mostly avoided, obfuscated and simply ignored until one was faced with it personally. The lack of experience makes it feel overwhelming.
Our language was becoming more euphemistic before Covid. The words "death" and "die" were rarely heard. The focus was usually oneasing that passing and managing death in a way that diverted distress. I felt that the human process of grieving, with its incumbent pain, stress and sadness, and the death industry's aims, were diverging. It was welcomed by many.
The approach was challenged by the Pandemic. Death and the consequences of death were the focus of every news report. The facts were painful and raw. The word was pronounced "death" and the word "die" was pronounced "die" The people had not passed. I thank you for rewilding the language.
Interviews with families became like wake beside the coffin in the parlour as the Pandemic continued. When there was little or no desire to see the body after death, now the denial of contact at the end of life and afterwards was traumatising.
I hope the change in society's approach to death is a positive out of our new reality. It's too early to tell, and I'm inside the taboo, looking out. I think that a new willingness to engage with death would be a good change.
I have been fortunate. None of my family members have died from Covid or been hospitalized. Three of my friends have died during the Pandemic, two from natural disease and one from an accident. Even though covid has killed many, I was reminded that other causes also kill millions.
Humans die, so let's face it. Life is for living until then.
Dr Shepherd is an author. Michael Joseph wrote The Seven Ages of Death. Purchase your copy at guardianbookshop.com to support the Observer. Delivery charges may apply.
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