Michael Bay attends the press conference for the world premiere of Netflix's '6 Underground' at Four Seasons Hotel on December 02, 2019 in Seoul, South Korea. (

Michael Bay does a lot of shit. He doesn't hate the Earth like his co-master of cinematic disaster, but he loves destroying things on the planet and putting them on film, and he takes a lot of care when doing so. He cares so much that he equates his artistry with the process by which a chef might make a salad.

Bay's words are not mine. In an interview with Empire, the director explained his philosophy about making things explode. It is like a recipe. Some directors do it, and they look like they are trying to impress someone. There are different ways to make explosions look realistic. It's like making a Caesar salad.

I understand what he is saying. I may think that most Michael Bay movies are bad and stupid, but I have no doubt that he carefully crafts each explosion he puts on screen. I don't know if that care means anything to viewers or if Bay's recipes affect our emotional responses. Since there are a lot of subtle things movies do to convey information and emotional impact, I allow that the latter is possible.

According to the interview, Bay thinks the biggest explosion ever put on film is a fireball in Pearl Harbor. The Guinness Book of World Records currently lists the destruction of Blofeld's base from the movie Spectre as the biggest, but at least Bay is taking it well. Ours is.

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