A Modest Proposal: Schools Must Open With Untested, Unmasked, Unvaccinated Children

The schools must be open.

School closings have been one of the greatest tragedies of the Pandemic. During their formative years, children have lost years of educational opportunities. This will affect them the rest of their lives. We can agree that schools must be open now that we can not change the past. I formulated a comprehensive plan that said the words "schools must be open" at every opportunity.

My plan was successful. In newspapers, on TV, and on social media, I said that schools must be open. I testified in court that schools should be open. Everyone knows that I say schools must be open all the time.

The best way to avoid getting sick with the virus is to get sick with it.

Children are very low-risk from COVID-19. There is no reason to protect children from the virus if older people are more at risk. I was opposed to having children wear masks, test for vaccine safety, and have vaccine requirements for schools. I told parents that covid vaccines for children should not get emergency use authorization, that kids don't need COVID-19 vaccines to return to school, and that the downsides of masking young students are real. I said that omicron infections may be a vaccine. I wanted to make the virus look attractive so that it would be attractive to a pharma company. Ask your doctor if Omicron is right for you. It is Nature's Vaccine!

I breathed vaccine side-effects. The number of times I said the word "vaccine myocarditis" was greater than the number of children hospitalized with the condition. I didn't want parents to know that most vaccine myocarditis cases are mild and resolve quickly. I mentioned that children should not bevaccinated because of the possibility of infections. The studies showing the vaccine can keep adolescents alive and out of the hospital are completely unmentionable.

I said the epidemic was over many times. When I said "delta variant, delta shmariant" just before that variant hospitalized and killed a large number of children, who can forget? The harms of the virus and the risks of the vaccine were overstated in my writing. In the past two years, the flu killed 3 children while COVID-19 killed 1,090 children. I told the parents that the mortality risk for children from the flu is less than the risk from the annual flu. If anyone disagrees with this, I will either write in an international newspaper or on a radio show about how I have been silenced.

I can credit the fact that only a small percentage of children are fully protected against COVID-19. I know my efforts have paid off when I see that the number of children hospitalized is more than double their previous peak. I was hoping for mass infections of children.

The most compassionate approach that balances the risks and benefits of herd immunity is to allow those who are at minimal risk of death to live their lives normally.

In a world where 3 is larger than 1,090 and the best way to avoid getting sick with the virus is to get sick with the virus, this all makes sense.

Don't blame me.

Repeatedly saying that schools must be open is a legacy I can be proud of. You can read any newspaper to find out how things are going for children and schools. I don't blame you if you read about schools closing due to COVID-19 cases. I did my part.

I was the one who said schools must be open more often.