Although parenting is not easy, it's not impossible.
Researchers have recognized 'parental exhaustion' as a condition where parents are overwhelmed by their primary caregiving role. This can lead to parental ineffectiveness, neglect and emotional distance.
Where does this phenomenon originate? A team of researchers from UCLouvain in Belgium conducted a survey to determine if cultural factors could contribute to parental burnout. The data was collected in the relatively normal parenting environment before COVID-19 lockdowns began around the globe, between 2018 and 2020.
Participants were also asked questions about their family dynamics, in addition to collecting data about their sociodemographic characteristics.
Prevalence of parental stress. (Isabelle Roskam)
A questionnaire was used to assess parental burnout. It measured emotional exhaustion, emotional distance from their children, loss in pleasure being a parent and contrasts with the previous parent self. "
Although the results revealed that parental burnout is a variable phenomenon across countries, the researchers found a fascinating link when they compared burnout rates with standardized measures of cultural traits and values across the different countries.
"Individualistic culture, in particular, showed a noticeably higher prevalence, mean level of parent burnout," wrote the first author, Isabelle Roskam (developmental psychologist), in her study published in Affective Sciences in early 2021.
"Indeed individualism plays more role in parental burnout that either economic inequalities between countries or any other characteristic of an individual or family, such as the number and age children and hours spent with them."
This trend reflected the high levels of parental burnout in Western and 'Euro-American countries'.
The results showed that Belgium had the highest levels of parental burnout, at 8.1%, followed by the US at 7.9% and Poland at 7.71% (which had the overall highest level of parental burnout).
However, parents in many South American, African and Asian countries had a lower rate of parental burnout. The researchers speculate that this could be due to cultural factors. However, they acknowledge that further research is needed to confirm the link.
Researchers speculate that this could be because of a shift in parenting practices within countries that believe in individualistic ideas.
The researchers concluded that the current findings are consistent with the observation of sociologists that parenting norms have become more demanding in Euro-American countries over the past 50 years. This has led to increased parental investment and increasing psychological pressure on parents.
"What parents feed their children and how they discipline them, what they put them to sleep, what they do with them after they go to bed: these are all politically and morally charged issues. The line between what children need and what may enhance their development has been blurred and any other parenting style is considered dangerous.
Future research will be needed to answer these questions and confirm if these pressures are contributing significantly to parental burnout in the countries concerned. However, the researchers concluded that individualism was the only factor that could explain the variations in parental burnout prevalence.
The team has other suggestions on how to minimize parental burnout. Simply put, you don't have to do it all yourself and no one is perfect.
Roskam stated that the first step would be to restore in our cultures the notion of sharing and mutual assistance among parents within a family.
"Reject the ideal parent cult and look at all the parenting advice available to help you choose the best for your family."
These findings were published in Affective Science.
This article was first published in April 2021.
