One Way to Have Better Orgasms | A Cup of Jo

Are you feeling stressed? (Is the sky blue?) There's one way to help relieve stress, improve your sleep, and more: having orgasms. We spoke to Kiana, somatic sex expert, full-spectrum doula and Chief Brand Educator at Foria, about the tools you can use to get there...

First off, sex and masturbation can be a great form of self-care, don't you think? Sometimes you're exhausted and feel like flopping on the sofa and watching House Hunter reruns. But when you take the time to take care of yourself in this way, it always feels so good and soothing and worth it.

And apart from sex and orgasms feeling good, it turns out there are real wellness benefits, as well. Here are four big ones:

1. Orgasms help relieve stress.
In Naomi Wolf's book Vagina, she researched the connection between the neural wiring in the brain and the pelvis, and how they communicate with one another - quite a lot, it turns out. "When you have an orgasm, it reduces the amount of cortisol (the stress hormone) in your body, and causes a surge in positive neurochemicals, including dopamine (which contributes to feelings of pleasure and satisfaction). This chemical cocktail has a few different effects, including increased creativity and feeling powerful."

2. Orgasms help you get better sleep.
For many of us, worries about work or family or life overall can get in the way of our resting hours. "Sex - and orgasms in particular - help improve sleep quality by reducing cortisol in the body," Kiana explains. "Reducing cortisol relaxes your whole nervous system, which will help you fall into a deeper sleep cycle."

3. Orgasms bring you back into your body.
You know that feeling when your thoughts are running rampant? Orgasms - whether alone or with a partner - help bring you out of your head and back into your body. "They take you out of that hamster wheel thought cycle," says Kiana. Sex also helps to relax your whole body. "Stress isn't just in your mind," Kiana says. "You hold stress in your shoulders, your jaw, your butt cheeks!" That's where Foria's Awaken arousal oil comes in. It's an intimate arousal oil that you massage in and allow to absorb for 10 to 15 minutes.

4. Pleasure begets pleasure.
Making a mindful effort to incorporate more pleasure into our lives can also help re-wire how you approach other things that are meaningful to you. "When you start to clue into what feels pleasurable, it helps your body map out sources outside of sex that are also pleasurable, whether it's the way something tastes or the feel of the ocean against your skin. The more you engage with things that are nourishing and replenishing, the more it will help you balance out the stressors in your life."

So, sex - whether solo or with a partner - can help us feel better. But sometimes when you're stressed, the switch gets flipped off, and sex is the last thing you're in the mood for. And with busy lives, we're not always able to prioritize it. If you need help relaxing physically, Foria's Awaken arousal oil helps decrease muscular tension, increases blood flow, and supports your capacity for arousal.

"As a sex educator, I always say how important it is to have a tool kit that supports the process of arousal," Kiana says. " Awaken arousal oil, which has CBD and plant-based aphrodisiacs, is an amazing tool for partnered or solo sex, because it supports arousal on a physiological level. It brings blood flow to the genitals, so you'll notice a difference in both lubrication and the quality of your arousal."

The team at Foria receives glowing testimonials daily, and our friends raved about it, too. I've tried Awaken arousal oil at home and find that it makes a huge difference in helping me feel more relaxed and heightening sensations. It feels completely natural - there's no icy/hot sensation or anything. It just supports and enhances your body's natural ability to feel pleasure. I love that it takes what's already there and makes it easier to access.

BONUS for all readers: Foria is offering 20% off all products using code CupofJo20. Thank you so much!

P.S. Scheduling sex, and what if you've never had an orgasm?

(Photos courtesy of Foria. This post is sponsored by Foria, a brand whose mission and products we love. Thanks for supporting the brands that help keep Cup of Jo running.)