Although we have made suggestions to Jeff Bezos before about what he could do to his hundreds of billions of dollar, it seems that everyone has been thinking too small. According to CVT Soft Serve, while the public has called on Bezos, he has been able put a soft-serve ice-cream tap in his home and fulfill every child's dream.
The What The Actual. Fuck! Fuck! The caption of CVTs seems to be surprised that a billionaire would do such a thing, but I'm not sure why. If they had the money, who wouldn't want their own ice-cream machine? If I was as wealthy as Bezos, I would have a whole Golden Corral built right next to my home. It has soft-serve machines, as well as those delicious big jelly beans and garbage. Perhaps I would even let the public eat there free of charge. Ice cream tastes best when it is shared with others.
The internet reaction to Bezos' ice cream was hilarious. The Washingtonian noted that Amazon's HQ2 design looked suspiciously like soft-serve cones (which is a nice mental picture than thinking it as a poop emoticon). Vice reported the story with a tweet claiming that Big Boy Jeff no longer needs to leave his home for ice cream.
This raises the question: What is Jeff Bezos' diet? Other billionaires have bizarre diets. Warren Buffet is one example. He eats icecream for breakfast, eats tons of McDonald's and drinks Coke almost every day. Will Bezos join him on the ice cream breakfast train or save it for a special treat. These are the questions that the world needs to know the answers to.
We did, however, ask CVT Soft serve if we could interview Bezos' ice cream delivery person. Unfortunately, the company refused to share any details.
