My online shopping cart has an inflatable clown punchable. Since mid-June, it's been there. My therapist suggested physically channeling my anger (but safely). She suggested that I scream into a pillow. The clown idea was too much, at least for household clutter. Although I enjoy a good scream, I find it more enjoyable at concerts and sporting events. Instead, I chose to meditate every night to cope with anger.My irritability at the time was a surprising revelation of post-vaccine living. It finally felt like it was safe to feel again after months of emotional numbness. This was in response to the unpredictable nature of a pandemic. I was angry at the loss of time with my loved ones and the constant risk assessments that were required to protect my unvaccinated two children. Meditation helped me to put my anger in perspective and it soon subsided.The coronavirus delta variant began to make headlines. I was calm and remained so until the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention announced late July that people who have been immunized can infect others. It was a quick flurry of panic. All I believed was in my hands were unmasked visits by high-risk grandparents, fairly carefree hangouts at vaccinated friends, a low-risk school year, and everything else.A new headline claims that vaccine-vaccinated individuals' anger is harmful and will backfire. USA Today recently heard from public health experts that anger is common, understandable and not productive. My meditation on Ten Percent Happier taught me one thing: anger is a messenger. It can alert you to dangers, violate your boundaries, or unmet needs. It is important to not allow frustration to become overwhelming. This balance can be difficult to achieve. It takes a lot of mental and emotional effort to identify and control your worst impulses.It is not helpful to think that the vaccinated should keep their mouth shut or be submissive in order to avoid injury to another's pride.After 18 months of trying not to break the rules and staying positive, it is no surprise that those who made as many sacrifices as possible before vaccines became available are angry. Nearly 60% of Americans who are eligible for vaccinations have received their shots. Too many people have chosen to go a different route. We would see fewer deaths, hospitalizations and infections if we had more Americans vaccinated.The argument against letting vaccinated people vent their anger seems to rest on the possibility of alienating those who have refused to be jibed. Anger expressed in the form or blame or shame can cause hurt feelings, damage relationships and even lead to regret. However, it is not helpful to assume that the vaccinated should keep their mouths shut or be submissive to avoid inflicting injury on another's pride. People were angry because of the Delta. We should not tell them to calm down, but rather take their anger seriously.If public health professionals are inclined to lecture, they should think again. This is how much Americans who have been most cooperative and responsive to being urged to take on. Many people followed safety guidelines regarding masking and distancing before widespread vaccination. They helped to flatten the curve. They taught their children at home and quit unsafe jobs. People who were able to behave responsibly during the pandemic exercised great physical and psychological discipline as they watched others throw parties, burn masks and spread conspiracy theories. We are now being asked to dig deep, hold on to our anger and find grace where only grief and exasperation exist.Particularly healthcare workers are becoming more upset and furious. Once again, they are confronted with full intensive care units. They intubate otherwise healthy 20-somethings and try to notify a nextof kin, only to discover that the entire family has been affected by COVID-19. NPR spoke with one ICU nurse who said, "I cannot explain the feeling defeat when you pour all your energy into a patient and it doesn't enough." It's then that you realize that they could have been vaccinated, and it could've helped. There is no greater burden than watching people die from preventable causes.Recognizing this fact is not meant to be used as a justification for generalizations about who's not vaccinated or why they aren't, nor do we want to lump them all together into one group. While we can be angry, it is important to note that vaccine access may not be available in all communities. That unvaccinated households are more likely be food insecure and earn less than $75,000.00 per year. This historical and institutional racism has betrayed many people who would otherwise jump at the chance of protection against COVID-19.Defiantly, we can also say: It didn’t have to be this way. We might not be sending our children to school in fear with the increased availability of vaccination. In some cases, infection rates are higher than they were during pre-vaccination peak periods. People wouldn't have to worry about whether they should hold that once-postponed marriage or go on that long-awaited trip to see relatives for the first-time since 2020. We wouldn't be forced to see again how our fellow Americans die.Anger can be selfish sometimes, but it is a natural response to circumstances. An angry person will feel deprived of hope and replaced with more trauma and grief. Experts will tell you that this anger is not productive. People grieve for a normality that is only an illusion. They are aware that their loved ones and themselves are less secure. They are worthy of being heard.They are a way to ease the strain on those vaccinated, and keep this country stable.They can help ease the strain on those who are vaccinated, which will help to keep this country stable. The contagious nature of Delta means that those who aren't vaccinated cannot rely on the protection provided by widespread immunization. Those who have avoided their shots need to be aware of their contribution in slowing the progress towards herd immunity. We need to establish vaccine and mask mandates that force those who are hesitant or resistant towards taking meaningful responsibility for our collective well-being and health.Recent mandates for vaccines that were issued, planned or recommended for U.S. troops, federal workers and healthcare workers, as well as college students, are a great start. Data shows that mandates work, regardless of whether they require proof or regular testing for those who are not vaccinated. Once the Food and Drug Administration approves the mandates, they may be less controversial. Programs such as the Key to NYC Pass, which makes access to indoor activities like restaurants and gyms contingent on vaccinations, will also put pressure on those who aren't vaccinated to reconsider their choices. We need more employers and brands like United Airlines and the NFL to make clear expectations of their employees. Get vaccinated, or you will lose your job or face financial penalties.Mandates should be implemented in conjunction with legal and reasonable exceptions, and programs that provide social and economic support and increase vaccine access. This could include setting up clinics within the community or in neighborhoods, offering childcare and paid time off for parents and workers who are concerned about side effects and culturally sensitive approaches to those who object to vaccinations. It's impossible to expect the vaccinated to give up their lives, while others have flouted the rules, in order to care for the unvaccinated. It is unacceptable to ask the vaccinated not to watch while employers, public health officials, and other companies tinker with the unvaccinated.Although the vaccinated won't withhold their future cooperation as punishment for being scolded and silenced, they will still feel resentment which could continue to divide us. Public health experts and public health officials need to ask more of the unvaccinated if they want them to let go of their anger and move forward.
