Tina LaRosa didn't know much about the virtual world-building game when she started playing this summer.
The 16-year-old high school sophomore was there to help launch a pilot of ExperienceCraft, a server for grieving youth between the ages of seven and 14.
The pilot was the result of a partnership between Experience Camps, a nonprofit that offers a one-week overnight summer camp for children who have experienced the death of a parent, sibling, or primary caregivers, and Connected Camps, an online learning platform powered by youth experts. The summer camp is attended by a thousand kids each year. It's goal is to provide an opportunity for grieving children to connect as they play the game.
It was a personal project for LaRosa. She went to Experience Camps for the first time after her mother's death. LaRosa was invited to join the youth advisory board for the pilot in order to help shape the server. She wanted the server to be a place that focused on fun and connection and embodied Experience Camp values. The goal was the same for everyone involved in the creation of the server. The project is supported by a $100,000 grant.
Hundreds of children were invited to join ExperienceCraft prior to the launch. The kids were waiting for the pilot. They found floating text outlining community rules when they entered the server. The memorial garden, where players could honor their loved one with unique builds, was one of the areas where players were ushered into a central hub from which they could travel to other areas. They were able to communicate with each other on a Discord server.
ExperienceCraft includes thoughtful spaces like the memorial garden. Credit: ExperienceCraft
There's no real pressure that the community is playing a grief game. "Obviously everyone knows that, but we pushed the idea of just make it fun first and focus on the connections and friends that could be made."
LaRosa says that peer relationships with people who understand what it's like to grieve can be comforting. An estimated 5.6 million children in the US will lose a parent by the age of 18. Many children of color have lost their primary caregivers as a result of COVID-19.
It's not possible to match the scale of youth grief with the available resources. One of the world's most popular video games was used as a way to meet children where they are. The designers of ExperienceCraft want to reach grieving youth who might otherwise feel alone as the server expands.
Connected Camps' co-founder and chief designer said she wanted to create a sense of belonging for players who might feel isolated in their grief.
Drawing on feedback from LaRosa and other youth advisory board members as well as Connected Camps' insights from creating a thriving server were very intentional about ExperienceCraft's features.
The registration process includes information about the player's death. The identity of the child is confirmed by the moderators to make sure no one enters the server with a false identity. A parent's email is needed to join the server and players must be approved by an administrator. Players don't reveal their names. They are invited to be a great community member when they start in ExperienceCraft.
There are protections for players in ExperienceCraft. Background checks have been done on volunteer and paid moderators. Teens or college-age mentors are some of the people. All commands and messages can be seen in real time.
The memorial garden in ExperienceCraft gives players a space to honor their loved one. Credit: ExperienceCraft
Players are not allowed to join each other's Zen spaces without an invitation. The memorial garden can't be edited, meaning that deeply personal expressions of grief can't be accidentally or deliberately violated. The ability to see who built and who altered something makes it easy to hold players accountable for their actions. A moderator is trained to take players to The Resort if they act out. They want to address the emotions behind their actions instead of punishing them. If a player's caregivers are needed, a protocol is in place. There have been few conflicts so far.
Even as the topic of grief surfaces in unexpected ways, the guardrails have created a safe space for players to have fun. ExperienceCraft's build battles are her favorite part of the game. A player decorated their tree house with purple flowers to honor their loved one's favorite color. LaRosa said the participants were supportive of each other's work.
The players built virtual objects like a snowman and flames that turned into a house during the holiday campfire challenge. One player built a dining room table in memory of having a sit down dinner. In private chats, players will talk about what they've built with the group. Sometimes it's good for players to just share what they've created.
"Not unlike camp itself, it's a great mixture of fun but also opportunities to express that grief if you would like to," says Fox Besch, a 17-year-old Experience Camp participant who joined the server as a volunteer during the pilot.
Besch is eager to expand the server's reach. It is open on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday from 5 to 8 pm. There is an hour and a half later. Besch says ExperienceCraft offers something special to youth grappling with grief.
Even if the server is more accessible than an annual sleep-away camp, there are practical barriers to overcome if you want to join ExperienceCraft. You need a Mac or PC computer, a tablet, iPad, or PS4 to play the game. The required software can't be run on phones and Chromebooks. It's possible to run the software on most devices. The internet connection is important for players.
Since reaching children regardless of their family's income and location is a priority for Experience Camps, Dubin says the nonprofit is identifying youth programs that serve bereaved children and can provide technical resources and in- person support that some players might not have.
The advisory board and pilot included players from the Center for Grieving Children, a program of the Boys & Girls Clubs. The players benefited from the peer support aspect of ExperienceCraft. The importance of restoring a grieving child's sense of ordinariness is emphasized by Hollister. She says that the game feels normal to children because they have played it before.
One ExperienceCraft moderator experienced a loss during the pilot and made this memorial for their loved one. Credit: ExperienceCraft
The volunteer and Hollister were trained to moderate. She thinks that support from adults who have undergone background checks should be included in any expansion.
The server is being explored by Experience Camps and the Boys & Girls Clubs of America. When ExperienceCraft launches in the Boys & Girls Club of Menasha, Wisconsin, it will give a sense of how easy it is for other clubs to access the server. During the club's programming hours, players will be able to log into ExperienceCraft. Smaller school based programs that serve grieving children are being identified by Experience Camp.
Dubin talked about how alone kids can be during the holidays.
"For some kids, there isn't anything out there," says Dubin, noting that camp may not be open when they need it or a counselor may not be available. If ExperienceCraft is here, they will be able to be around other people who understand it.
A guide for navigating grief can be found on the website. If you're a family dealing with a mental health crisis, you can call the 988 Suicide and Crisis Hotline at 988, or the Trans Hotline at (877) 565-8860. You can text "start" to the Crisis Text Line. The help line is open from 10:00 a.m. to 10:00 p.m. on Mondays through Fridays. Email info@nami.org You can use the 988 Suicide and Crisis Hotline at crisischat.org if you don't want to use the phone. International resources are listed here.
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