It's a good day! It is nice to see so many familiar characters. There is a Blue subscriber in the front row. You would have appreciated it. We are here to remember our beloved social media platform. The day that a billionaire with terrible ideas and a worse sense of humor bought it was October 27th.
I would not be where I am today if it weren't forTwitter. It gave my brain a new lease on life, by constantly auditioning summaries of all the strange things that happened to me to see if they fit into the 140 character limit. If it turned my attention into Swiss cheese, what would it be like? In some of my most desperate hours, like the time I thought I was going to die in a missile attack in Hawaii or the time I mistook a laundry hamper for a trash can in a hotel room, I used the social media platform to communicate.
If it turned my attention into Swiss cheese, what would it be like?
All of us were given a lot. We were able to keep an eye on the cat. We were able to laugh at dumb jokes. Two llamas evading capture made us all happy. The Dilbert guy hate speech made you want to throw your phone into the ocean. If you were aware of it in the early 2010s, you know it now. Automatic check-ins and follow Fridays were included. It's really cringe-worthy.
It turned out to be a really great thing. There is a place where people hang out. Rest it's soul where vine flourished. After watching the Cats trailer and seeing rich people forced to eat bad cheese sandwiches, we collectively shrieked in horror.
The server in the sky is where we know and love the best.
It was difficult to watch. The confusion is crying for help. It was a mess. Mario was the one who flipped us all the birds. I will be dealing with that trauma for a while. We can take solace in the fact that it wasn't us. The server in the sky is a better place than the one we know and love. I know all of you will remember that as well.
We will be having coffee and light refreshments after this service on social media. You should leave your legacy verified badges at the door when you leave the building.
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