When I was 18 months old, I called a stranger 'daddy' at the park. My mom fell in love with him and he became my real dad.

• When I was a year old, my mom left my dad.

• One day at the park, I called a man I didn't know, and he and my mother started dating.

• I don't call him my dad because he's my dad.

I have to pick my father. He taught me how to swim, how to deal with a panic attack, and how to eat my vegetables.

The tire rubber on the ground was chopped up and I ran ahead of the slide. I remember a man with a big black beard and warm eyes who was tall and comforting. I handed him my baby giraffe and said, "Father!" Don't let me get away!

I had never met this man before.

As I slid down, he held my hand. My mom was full of danger when we went to the bottom. I looked up to see her. Daddy!

When my twin brother and I were young, my mother left my father. I prefer not to think of my misidentification as a mistake because my biological father had a beard.

By the end of the day, my dad had invited us all to his house for dinner. Six months later, we moved.

I took his name after he married my mom

When my parents got married, they asked me if I wanted to keep my last name or take his, and I said yes. Sharing my family's name made me happy. I chose my stepdad's name even though my biological father blocked the adoption because he wasn't ready to be a father himself.

He's not a step away from anything, so it's odd to call him my step dad. He taught me to identify poison ivy and to wire electrical sockets, but he let me make my own pizzas. It's wrong to waste food and he made me eat them too. My father is my father.

12 years after I chose him, he prepared me for a life without him.

My family is my choice over blood

Their divorce was hard to handle. For a long time, we didn't talk. I didn't speak to him when I moved into the basement with my mom. He showed up when I was out of town to hang a door so my room wouldn't be public. He showed up in the snow when I was learning to drive. He told me I needed to learn to drive in the snow, but I didn't need to talk.

I was too upset to forgive him until my junior year. He taught me to ski. He showed me that I can be afraid and still be in control. If you allow the fear to control you, you're stuck. I spoke to him.

He said sorry. He was responsible. He raised his hand.

When I came back from college, I told my mom I was going to make dinner and invited my dad, his first wife, my brothers, and my mom's ex-step dad.

It was the first time we've been together since our divorce. Our family has always been about choice over blood, even though I was related to four of the 11 people at that table.

Every holiday since, we've been together.

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