Hannah Ross has a facial abnormality called Goldenhar syndrome.
She pretends to be a famous person in order to get the attention of strangers.
Her story was told to Jane.
An as-told-to essay was written by Hannah Ross. It has been edited to make it clearer.
Goldenhar syndrome is a rare congenital condition. Problems with the spine and ears can be caused by it.
One of my eyes is lower than the other, which is noticeable to me. The way my face looked made me feel like I was not good enough.
I had my first surgery when I was a baby. I had an eyelid on my left eye. The surgeons made a skin transplant from my ear. I have trouble seeing in that eye.
I have had many surgeries to my face and body since then. My back was straightened with metal rods put into it. A section of bone from my skull was taken when I was 10 years old. It was very bad.
As a child, my condition did not affect me. I didn't think about looking different at all. I was fortunate because I had friends who treated me the same. I remain good friends with them.
In my early teens, I felt like I wasn't good enough. It was difficult because some teens can be very judgmental. I started to wonder if I am a lot different from other people. My self-esteem wasn't high.
The stares made me feel less confident. I stopped going out in public when I was too scared to. I wanted someone to be nice to me. I was not confident to deal with being stared at. I thought people were judging me.
Three years ago, I had a different perspective on things. We were going into a fast food joint. I felt like I was in danger. The restaurant was full of people and I didn't like busy places.
I realized as we walked through the door that I had to take control of the situation. I didn't want to worry about what other people thought of me.
I came up with a better way to deal with staring. I was going to pretend to be a famous person.
Some celebrities seem to be flattered by the attention they get. I made an alter ego for myself. I made my brain think that I was more confident. It was similar to faking it until you make it.
I started to believe that people weren't staring at me because of my facial differences. Maybe they're wondering if I'm a famous person. I turned a negative thing into a positive one. I can't see if people are judging me or not. They might be interested. I don't care if they are judging. I'm not responsible for it on them.
I talk about stories and other aspects of my life on my social media accounts. I am constantly stepping outside of my comfort zone because I am an apprenticeship in a nursery school. I'm willing to tackle things that I wouldn't have been afraid of before.
Changing Faces helps people with facial differences and raises awareness about the issue. It's something to be proud of. Every person is unique.
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