Scott Allan column: I have an asterisk next to my name

I'm the free agent with an "a" in his name.

For the first time in 14 years, I didn't have a club when the season started and I played 17 games for Hibs.

Life is left in me. I need to be doing physical activity. It's thrown doubt in the minds of some of the clubs since being diagnosed with the heart condition. I am aware of how chairmen think. It would be a problem for some teams.

I've spent a lot of time getting back. Since I've been a professional, this is the first summer in 14 years where I haven't been in contact with anyone.

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I think the time I've had to reflect will make me a better player when I return. It's a big world out there, you know what you miss.

I wanted to do everything I could to keep going. I went to different doctors. One was from London and one was from the United States. We found a way that would allow me to continue working.

I've had the condition for a long time, but it just got to a point where it was showing up. I've been playing football for 10 years with that and type-1 diabetes. I have done everything I can to get back in shape.

At the time, I knew something was wrong. I knew I didn't feel right after seeing it myself. I had been through it before and I wanted to make sure it was okay. It can be hard when it's marred with diabetes.

It took five months to get back into shape and then two or three months to get back on the field. It's a full year and mentally it's difficult. I left the season deflated because I didn't feel like I had put in enough to get back to being the same player.

'The game doesn't wait for anybody'

After coming back to Hibs, I'm the first one out. I was deflated by how hard I worked because I needed a run of games.

You will see the best of me when I play six games to get up to speed. I don't think I got that chance in the last season. There isn't any momentum gathered.

You don't have minutes under the belt and you have a heart problem, so when teams look at it, they look and say, "Maybe we'll go for someone else"

The game doesn't wait for anyone. I need my next place to be perfect. To get back playing is what I need to do.