Supernatural forces are seen as illusions by many people. Love is still an exception to the trend of rationality.
People are used to seeing romantic love presented as it is on the reality show "The Bachelor." It's an idea that anyone who has been in love can relate to and it's laughable. According to our research, fated love and soulmates are very common.
psychology researchers are interested in why human beings think, feel, and behave the way they do. Some insight into the quandaries that have plagued people in love might be offered by this question.
Is it a good idea to blindly trust your heart to lead you to happiness? Is there a tendency to think about love with skepticism and strive for rationality in the quest for a fulfilling relationship?
Romantic love has been a part of human nature for a long time.
Although cultures differ in their stories and expectations about romantic love, the phenomenon appears to be virtually universal, as love letters written 4,000 years ago in Mesopotamia are remarkably similar to those written today.
Our research shows that fated love and soulmates are very common.
Love is a part of the mind. This question is explored through evolutionary psychology.
Our ancestors were more likely to survive and reproduce if they made them think and act the way they do today.
The human mind evolved to prioritize things that contributed to survival and reproduction, such as highly nutritious foods and potential mates.
Our ancestors were able to survive or reproduce because of the confusing feeling of falling in love and the illogical belief that one's relationship is supposed to be. The apartment lease agreement is said to be the key to love's purpose.
People agree to long lease for apartments. The landlord might be able to find a better tenant if the tenant finds a better apartment.
It's better for both parties to make a long-term commitment to an imperfect but sufficient lease instead of searching for the perfect apartment. The crucial bond is provided by the signed lease agreement.
There is a similar commitment problem when it comes to partners. Humans prefer monogamous relationships that last at least a few years. There is a lot of motivation to get it right because of this commitment.
It's difficult to find an ideal partner and it's even harder to find an ideal partner. If you want to solve the commitment problem and pass down your genes, you should commit to a good partner.
Love may have been created as a biological lease agreement in order to solve the commitment problem.
Love is still very much a part of life for gay, asexual, and other people who don't have sex. The evolution of same-sex attraction has been studied by researchers who argue that romantic relationships can provide advantages.
There is no single "normal" or "ideal" way of being.
Love helps to ensure commitment after you've fallen for a partner.
It makes other potential mates seem lackluster, and it makes other good looking people less attractive than single people do. The perceptual shift makes one's partner seem more of a catch in comparison and discourages them from pursuing other romantic options.
Love causes jealousy, a mate guarding adaptation that motivates vigilance and defensiveness towards those who might threaten your relationship Evolutionary psychologists argue that jealousy can help prevent infidelity and attempts to steal your partner.
As our team explores in ongoing research, the supernatural stories people tell about love may increase their confidence in the value of their relationship.
Despite being based in fantasy, magic can be adaptive. Emotions are unpredictable and can be turbulent. A narrative that suggests your relationship is meant to be could be a reason to stay together for the long haul.
If a belief in fated love helps to cement a long-term commitment to a good partner, it can be considered deeply rational. Love is an "unreasonable bond that becomes reasonable by virtue of its own existence" according to Karl Deisseroth.
It makes sense for love to feel magical even if it doesn't seem like it. The research shows that love's magic can help people pass their genes down.
What do you do with the knowledge that love's magic exists to fulfill evolution's goal of passing your genes on to future generations, rather than to lead to happiness or even an accurate perception of reality? We can improve on the advice of so many contestants on "The Bachelor" to follow your heart, trusting that you will find meaning in the pursuit of a biological imperative.
There is a bit of truth in that cliché. If you revolt against that thinking, you may be over thinking your way out of a great gift.
Jonathan Schooler and Oliver Sng are assistant professors of psychology at the University of California, Irvine.
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