Bryce Mitchell thinks Uvalde was part of a government conspriacy.

It's always a good idea to consider your subject. The mass shooting in Uvalde, Texas, which left 19 children and two teachers dead, could be avoided if the person was recently on a noteworthy podcasts spouting off gross conspiracy theories.

When Brendan Schaub broached the subject with up-and-coming UFC fighter Bryce Mitchell, he probably expected a stream of vile, dangerous claims. If the exchange had been published on the Thicc Boy website, society would have been better off.

The gem that mass shootings are government-sponsored attempts to take away his guns was one of Mitchell's conspiracy theories.

He did the same thing when he was given the chance to host a show on the internet. Mitchell believes the reason the police didn't storm into the classroom was because government officials ordered them to stand down to allow the shooter to kill more children.

I promise that gun-toting lunatics don't need government help to carry out mass shootings. Politicians worry more about losing supporters than innocent people getting shot dead at nightclubs, schools, offices, churches, concert venues, malls, grocery stores, and on and on.

The host of the show, a media personality who is on record saying trainers shouldn't be held accountable when they use racist language, probably shouldn't have an outlet in the first place.

The reason Mitchell wasn't canceled before he could choke, pluck, and fry his breakfast is because his boss is Dana White, who owns an MMA league. There is a lack of Rogan variant. Please open a portal to that one so I can go through it with Benedict.

White will use that footage in the promo material for Mitchell's next performance.

I don't have a good kicker for this. Mitchell is a clown and should be muzzled. Zipity doodah.