We tasted the expanded collection of Star Trek wines and found them… wanting

Ars staffers tasted two bottles of Star Trek Wines in honor of the announcement of Star Trek:Picard. The wines were much better than we expected.

The folks behind Star Trek Wines have expanded their collection from two to six varieties after the second season of Picard. There was a second informal wine tasting. The actor John de Lancie and the writer of The Orville, Andre Bormanis, are two people who can help us in this noble endeavor. They joined a group of eight other people in Los Angeles, where the nibbles were plentiful and the conversation flowed freely. The wine assessments were anonymous. The wine was not given for promotional purposes.

The first thing we should do is revisit the original two varieties. A blend of 87 percent zinfandel, blended with Petite Sirah and a hint of syrah, was described as the first Sonoma Valley zinfandel. The packaging claims the wine is produced under the United Federation Special Reserve Label and blended by an astronomer to fit the tastes of multiple planets.

This is a typical California zinfandel, light, smooth, and fruit forward. It has a fairly high alcohol content, and it pairs well with cheese and charcuterie. Even though clear glass is not good for long-term storage for wines, the bottle design is terrific. If you like collectibles, save the bottle and drink the wine now.

The Federal Reserve zinfandel received similar comments from our new group of tasters, who also noted the fruit forward profile and soft finish. People who like fruitier wines in general liked this zinfandel more than others.

The blend from Chateau Picard is 85 percent cabernet and 15 percent merlot, but the label claims it is a 2386 vintage to keep the conceit going. In the Burgundy region, Jean-Luc Picard's family has a fictional vineyard of the same name, but it is not in Bordeaux. The winery agreed to make a special edition of their wine for the Star Trek collection.

It is a Bordeaux blend that is dryer than the zinfandel, with a longer finish and more interesting spices.

The Bordeaux blend came out on top with the tasting crew, who said it was perfectly quaffable andsurprisingly good. Bordeaux wine makers have had hundreds of years of experience to draw upon. The tasting crew polished off this bottle.

The four new Star Trek wine varieties are not as good as their predecessors. The United Federation of Planets Special Reserve Sauvignon Blanc and Andorian Blue Premium Chardonnay are bland and offensive.

The Andorian Blue is blue in hue thanks to the addition of a food dye. The wine is barely has any flavor, so it is a gimmick that gives it a slight aftertaste. That is atypical for a chardonnay. Good chardonnays are light in 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 888-270-6611 The Andorian Blue is light, but it lacks any distinctive flavor notes, other than that unfortunate hint of blue dye.

One person wrote that the Sauvignon Blanc was so light that it did not exist. The kindest comments were that the wine was unassuming and would make a good fit for a weekend afternoon BBQ, or perhaps a suitable accompaniment to spicy Thai food.

There is a Blood Wine and a Cardassian Kanar Red Blend. The wines marketed with the most blatant appeals to fan service were found to be undrinkable by nearly all the people who tasted them. The corkscrew shape of the Cardassian blend is a great example of bottle design by Star Trek Wine.

The broad consensus was that the Klingon Blood Wine is trying to be a pinot noir and falling short; it is basically a very fruity California cabernet, with perhaps a hint of pepper.

The worst wine in the collection is the Cardassian Kanar Red Blend. The Cardassians will never rule the galaxy with wine like this, according to one person. If you are nostalgic for the flavors of your childhood, it would make sense to pair it with Do-Si-Dos or a similar peanut butter cookie. At least one person seemed to like it.

It is our recommendation that taste in wine is highly subjective. If you want to collect the whole set of unusual bottle designs, stick with the original two bottles for Star Trek wine, or save yourself some money and get something comparable for a fraction of the price. You are a Cardassian who loves wine.