Friday, February 22, 2019
Tags Comedy

Tag: comedy

Trump Offers to Station Pence at Border with Binoculars in Lieu...

WASHINGTON ( The Borowitz Report)-In an unexpected breakthrough that could end the government shutdown, President Donald Trump has backed down from his demand for...

Americans Nostalgic for Republican Who Only Wanted to Screw Over Forty-Seven...

WASHINGTON ( The Borowitz Report)-In a sign of voters' shifting perspectives about Presidential hopefuls, a new survey reveals that Americans are deeply nostalgic for...

Mueller Offers Cyber Monday Plea Deals

WASHINGTON ( The Borowitz Report)-Robert Mueller's announcement that he would be offering Cyber Monday plea deals touched off hysteria among disgraced Trump associates desperate...

‘SNL’ Asks: How Does Sarah Sanders Sleep At Night? HuckaPM Pills

When you tell whoppers like White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders it's often hard to sleep at night, according to a sly "...

Americans Would Feel Safer If a Huge Caravan of Angry White...

MINNESOTA ( The Borowitz Report)-A vast majority of Americans would feel significantly safer if an enormous caravan consisting...

Fox News Says Megyn Kelly’s Blackface Comments Not Racist Enough to...

NEW YORK ( The Borowitz Report)-The chief executive officer of Fox News said on Monday that Megyn Kelly's nostalgic remarks about blackface were insufficiently...

Republicans Projected to Pick up Seventy Seats in Prison

WASHINGTON ( The Borowitz Report)-In a development that could dramatically change the composition of the federal penitentiary system, Republicans are projected to pick up...

Californians Puzzled by Trump’s Failure to Blame Wildfires on Hillary

SACRAMENTO, California ( The Borowitz Report)-Californians were baffled on Monday by a series of tweets by Donald J. Trump in which he utterly failed...

Michelle Wolf’s ‘ICE’ Recruitment Video Borders On Brilliant

U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, better know as ICE, has been under fire for aggressively rounding up immigrants for deportation, many of whom have...

Trump Hires Only Lawyer in U.S. with Fewer Clients Than Michael...

WASHINGTON ( The Borowitz Report)-The White House announced on Thursday that Donald Trump had successfully secured the services of Rudolph Giuliani, after an exhaustive...