The $350,000 Mercedes-AMG G63 4x4² Is Bigger, Badder, Better

The Mercedes-Benz G63 4x42 is too tall to drive under the entry gate at the parking garage I use. I like to window shop in Beverly Hills and it won't fit on the ramps.

It's not easy to get into the cabin at 6 foot, 2 inches or more in my heels. It has almost 14 inches of clearance.

I can't see anything when I look through the mirror. There is a black wall behind the back gate that hides the entire rear end.

It's like a wolf among sheep trying to fit in the drive-through line at In-N- Out because of its obnoxious black fender flares, tinted headlights and taillights, mud flaps and carbon fiber plastered across its hulking body. With permanent all-wheel drive and a box shape, the "Squared" moniker is rah-rah.

Does any of that make me want to kill this beast? It's absolutely not.

The Mercedes-Benz G63 4x42 screams disruption. It feels very bossy to drive it. I liked it very much.

Birth of the Cool

I should start this review with an homage to the Mercedes-Benz Gelnde­wagen (G Wagen for short), because that is the origin of the 4x4 version I drove for a week in Los Angeles.

The Gelnde­wagen is almost like a pure vehicular embodiment of form following function. It came with a narrow wheel track, locking differentials, dominating ride height, rugged components, and even a folding windshield, and was intended for both military and civilians. The Shah of Iran was one of the first to adopt the square rig, which was popular with upscale Germans, Brits and Americans.

Since 1979 the G has been produced. It has become an icon despite its small legroom in the back, lack of a decent dashboard, and road habits of half the yokels who drive them. The prototype of the modern SUV was decades ahead of its time and set the tone for today's six-figure rigs.

I will always remember the debut of the modern form of the G at a crumbling theater in Detroit. The two men were wearing cowboy hats. There was a lot of burning things. It was the best car show I have ever been to.

Expensive Excellence

The Mercedes-AMG G63 4x42 costs more than the standard G Wagen's base price of $139,000 and more than the Rolls-Royce Cullinan's base price of $79,000. It offers more when you add in social status such as I did when I parked in front of Bijan on Rodeo Drive to go to a party at Piaget.

The 4x42 will go off-road with its 41.3 degree-approach angle and 38.6 degree-departure angle. The natural habitat of the G is in wealthy urban areas. I didn't expect to get a lot of love from my fellow road hogs, but I did. It might be a commentary on LA.

The V8 twin-turbo engine in the 4x42 is more powerful and capable than the V6 engine in the previous model. In five seconds, it can go from zero to 60 mph. portal axles are wheel shafts that attach at the top of the wheel rather than the center and are geared downward. Additional ground clearance is created by this.

The wheels have been enlarged to 22 inches and the tires have been widened as well. A carbon fiber light rack rests on the roof along with a black hole of a spare tire carrier.

The total weight of the thing is 6,315 pounds. The magic is that it drives very well. Really enjoyable. I don't know how Mercedes came up with a vehicle that is as tall as a truck but does not roll around corners. It sticks to the ground.

I am not sure how Mercedes was able to make the nine-speed automatic transmission so seamless when it has such off-road challenges as three locking differentials and a transfer case. I was able to pick anything I wanted in front of me. The SUV made a noise and did it.

I don't know how Mercedes can claim that the 4x42 is more light than the last one. A spokesman wouldn't say how much it was or how it was made. The 4x42 is moving as fast as a Hippo on skates. I painted delightful tire tread pirouettes from the Arts District to West Hollywood.

I want more for whatever they did to it. Changing my shopping habits is something I am considering.